Thursday, August 22, 2013


I often hear stories about survivors being let down by the church.

The complaints tend to be centered around religious actions that yield no results, or unsympathetic words (even prayers) that further injure and even blame the victim. 
Survivors often complain they feel judged by the church. 
What? Gods people judging each other? *Sarcasm*
It's like, once you become a survivor you're a second class christian. 
You're welcome to attend and let us say a two minute prayer for you (that's really for us) but, please don't talk about "it".
"It" being the abuse, the assault, the big fat reminder the church failed you by not preventing it, or using resources to help you now. 

If you're a survivor who gets their "Chrstianese" on and talks about "The Lord never give us more than we can handle" --totally dismissing that we live in a fallen world with an enemy who is out to kill, steal and destroy us. --Then your church/religious circle will accept you back as one of the redeemed flock. Just don't break the golden rule.
The church is so sterilized, my mess and I are not welcome.
"Come as you are." With mental illness? With scars from self harming? With a tattoo?
"Oh wait, cover those up first..."  Yeah, I thought so.

I hear regularly about survivors turning from God and the church. Their depression is too much for the church. They've been told to "Choose joy" and "Stand on the promises of God". 
I am not saying survivors shouldn't strive for these things but, why aren't we allowed our "Psalms" so to speak? Why is not okay to struggle with pain and talk about it? Why don't we hear songs about survivors in Christ? Are they not "sexy" enough for the church?

Church and religion has restricted God so much that survivors aren't getting the message that God didn't abandon them. The church has shown survivors secrecy is the only way, except IT'S NOT!
Gods word says "Know the truth and the truth shall set you free. "
The word "Know" here means deep and intimate. The truth you know intimately shall set you free.
I implore churches and survivors to know your truth.
You are a survivor, KNOW it and know also that God is not limited by the truth.

Survivors get to know these following truths as well.
He (God) is not afraid of your dissociative disorder. He created multiple personalities...He himself is part of the trinity ..three in one. God is not afraid of your self harm scars, He sacrificed His Son on a cross....He wore His nail scarred hands to show the disciples. God's hands are not tied in reaching you when you have a P.T.S.D. flashback. He created your mind. God is not limited by your anger, your pain, your confusion or your past. We survivors limit ourselves with respect to the promises He has for US when we don't know the truth.

 Blessed is he who has regard for the weak; the LORD delivers him in times of trouble.
                                                                                                            Psalm 41:1
God has a plan for us... yes, us. The dirty tissue, the infected, the outcast, the self harmer, the overwhelmed, the suicidal, the slut shamed blamed victim, ALL OF US. He has plans to prosper US. Jeremiah 2:11 He promises to give us rest. Matthew 11:28-19
Can't stand being touched? That's okay He sent us a comforter who doesn't have to physically touch us but, a little time in His presence can help us heal.  John 16:7 He promises to save us. Romans 10:9
You don't have to do this recovery, surviving, and/or healing alone. He never intended that.
It all starts with Love.
I have felt abandoned by God, family, friends, the legal system and even myself.
There was always a faith that somehow kept me though, and a God, whose love saved me and never stopped. A God big enough and more than enough to know me and give a care. Know these verses and these words survivors. 

Church, Paul preached the gospel with an understanding that if he wanted to reach the people he had to be the people.
He was Jewish to Jews, weak to the weak, he was all things to all men for so long as Gods law allowed him. 1st Corinthians 9:19-23
My husband used to say "We will reach the lost by any means necessary short of sin." This should be every Christian's anthem. 
If the goal is to reach ALL people, then be a survivor with your survivors. Be a leader with your leaders. And be real with yourself. To understand the drug addict, you don't have to be one. You just need to know what addiction is like. To be a survivor you don't have to have been raped, assaulted or abused at all. You just need to understand what it's like to survive something. Where you lack in understanding God will make provision if you ask and are humble. Most of all KNOW how to love what and who you don't understand. So long as God does, we should.

Survivors don't need "Hail Mary's,"and/or the "Sinners prayer" (I dare you to find that one in the bible. Period). Survivors don't need the latest worship set (though good music helps anybody). Survivors need love, support and honesty. We don't need coddling. We also don't need bullying.
Sometimes we just need listening, other times we just need to be checked in on.

 If you're failing to represent the real God or at least a human trying to work out their salvation, you're doing this faith thing wrong. How is your current witness style working for you... or further more, OTHERS?

1 comment:

  1. "Where you lack in understanding God will make provision if you ask and are humble. Most of all KNOW how to love what and who you don't understand. So long as God does, we should." YES and amen.

    It is possible to minister to someone who is going through something completely foreign to you. If you ask God to give you understanding, to help you love, to provide words when words are the right thing, and help you sit in silence when listening is what is needed - He will do that. He will help you minister to the broken, hurting, lost, just trying to make it through another day people who are around you every day.